Learning to overcome loneliness, this is a personal narrative about a teenage girl going through internal conflicts during her summer camp.
Lonesome Summer
I didn’t like the narrow streets, I didn’t like the subway, I didn’t like the towering buildings, I didn’t like the people. New York was a dream city I always wanted to go; however, after I attended my summer camp in the School of Visual Arts, my mind changed.
On the day I was checking in, I got nervous, I wasn’t ready to live here alone. All the other students were already making friends, and I was the only one standing next to my parents, like a loser. My Dad tried talking to one of the girls, he was trying to make friends for me, and that was embarrassing. Dad kept nagging about how I should try socializing more. My parents kept saying, “make sure you don’t get lost, and always remember to call me.” I pushed them away, waved, and called, “Bye, Mom! Bye, Dad! You guys can leave now!” My parents walked off to the side and finally left the room. Mom and Dad were being annoying. I usually don’t like to show the “emotional side” of me, but that day, they almost made me cry. I hate how they worry so much. Talking about worrying, let me tell you an embarrassing story back when I was in 5th grade. We had an end of year trip to the Great Wall, but our bus left late because of my parents. They just wouldn’t let me go for 20 minutes. Mom was tearing up and kept hugging me, while Dad kept repeating, “Call me when you arrive.” And everyone was staring, literally everyone. Since 5th grade till now, nothing changed. Mom and Dad just worried too much.
Anyways, back to my summer school. I took the interior design course, and everyone was so talented. No kidding. 19 out of 20 students went to art high schools. I was super stressed. I had to work extra hard and prepare for my presentation every other day. Presenting to the whole class made me really depressed. I wasn’t confident enough to speak up in that environment, especially in front of those that were so much better than me. Meanwhile, the professor never complimented my work either, so my self-esteem got worse every day. But gladly, I did make two friends; Krista and Camille.
It was a chill day in New York. Smelling the hot dog coming from the food truck, people walking across the road, and cars beeping in traffic. I was on my way to SoHo with my friends. As we entered, I saw both sides of the street filled with clothing stores. My indecisive mind couldn’t choose a store to shop in. In the end, I just decided to go into H&M; but, Krista and Camille didn’t like it. In front of the H&M store, they just dragged me to another store for limited edition clothes. I saw the price tag, and I thought I read $8.5, but no, it was $85. The cheapest shirt was $85, yet Krista still bought something. It wasn’t a great start in SoHo, but it didn’t get any better. Krista took us to a restaurant called Laudrée. I opened the menu, and a BLT sandwich was $45. For the past few days, I’ve only been eating Whole Foods hot meals cause I had to save money for later emergencies. Obviously, the $45 sandwich was way too expensive for me to afford.
After lunch, I gave my debit card to the waiter. She swiped my card into the machine, but I was low on money. Then there was an awkward silence. I could feel my face getting pinker every second. So, Krista handed her card over my shoulders and towards the waiter, with sass, she said, “I’ll pay for her dish too.” I wanted to hide under the table. I was embarrassed. I thought I saved enough, but I was wrong. I was so mad I couldn’t pay for my sandwich, I was so mad because I felt like I was being looked down on my “friends.” And that’s how my day ended. A day filled with embarrassment.
In this chaotic city was packed with chaotic problems. A month in New York was a dreadful experience. The professor hated me, the students stressed me, and friends disrespected me. As days passed my parents stopped calling, and I didn’t have anyone to rely on. I was beating myself up by doing endless works of art, that made me feel less lonely. Just like that, a month flew by, just like that, my lonesome summer ended.
Rationale
Lonesome Summer is the title of my personal narrative. This story focuses on the conflicts I faced while I was attending a summer camp this year in the School of Visual Arts.
I begin my writing with the use of repetition because it gave a unique hook that drew the readers to the different conflicts in my story, (“I didn’t like the narrow streets, I didn’t like the subway, I didn’t like the towering buildings, I didn’t like the people”). Throughout the narrative, I went through three different conflicts; leaving my parents, class stress, and friendship problems. This focused on my theme of overcoming loneliness.
I included a flashback in the exposition of my story, “Talking about worrying, let me tell you an embarrassing story back when I was in 5th grade.” It was used to show the conflicts the protagonist was going through. To add on, words like, “chill,” “like,” and “literally” is evidence of colloquial language. I used a colloquial style language to make my writing informal and more personal. To help the reader feel my internal conflict, I used literary techniques like simile (“like a loser”), parallelism (“In this chaotic city was packed with chaotic problems”), and hyperbole (“I was beating myself up by doing endless works of art”). Also using strong words like, “hate,” “stress,” and “depressed” shows the characteristics of the protagonist; judgmental and negative.
Furthermore, pathos was expressed throughout the entire narrative by utilizing parallelism (“Just like that, a month flew by, just like that, my lonesome summer ended”), repetitively using the structure of parallelism brought out the tone of sorrow. The use of these literary devices helped describe the conflict of my narrative and brought together the theme of loneliness.