IO Feedback Comparison

This post is to compare the actual score I got and the one I anticipated for myself.

I was the more generous one when grading my own IO, I felt like I had a good understanding for the text, and my teacher, Mr. Dalton, certainly felt that as well. However, I didn’t do a good job in presenting my understanding for these, I didn’t pick out enough textual evidence to support my argument and thesis. This lead to a misrepresentation of my understanding and caused the A and B to go down. My tone was actually alright and it enhanced the presentation of the GI. I would pick out more textual evidence from both texts and give analysis on both the literal meaning and the broader meaning that it presents. I will pick out the evidences in advance and have my peers check my presentation quite long before IO to ensure changes can be made based on feedbacks.

IO #3 Reflection

Listening back to the third IO practice, we graded our own work using the key words and phrases from the official rubric.

A: 8
The understanding and knowledge of the entire work and the specific extracts are “good”, and I the interpretation is “sustained” in terms of relating to the global issue. Moreover, the literary evidences I picked out from the texts “effectively supports” my analysis, being the most appropriate ones in the extract given.

B: 7
The analysis of the authorial choices are “relevant and at times insightful” where I gave my personal interpretation of each textual evidence picked. One place where I could possibly improve on is the “understanding of the authorial choices”, I feel like some points in my presentation are a bit forced or stretched.

C: 6
The time taken on each text was not “balanced”, but the depth and significance of analysis are well maintained throughout that my presentation was “focused and sustained”. The presentation follows a “cohesive structure” that enhances the main points.

D: 7
The words used were “clear and accurate”; there were errors in language that “do not hinder communication”; “vocabulary and syntaxes are varied” as I used many different sentence structure. I accented the evidences that “enhance” the presentation.


What went well:

I did quite well in terms of timing my presentation and limiting the amount of information that I present. I only put forth relevant analysis of the texts which would probably raise my grade in strand A, focus and interpretation.



There are many more things I need to work on for the next IO. The analysis, for example, is an inevitable aspect that will be affected by the process of trimming down points of analysis. Moreover, my structure was somewhat unbalanced where I spent a bit too much time on the Kafka text. Finally, I would like to improve my speech so that it is more fluent and I would fit more content into it.

Exploring Global Issues in Kafka’s Short Stories

The Sudden Stroll


GI: How one’s true identity is shaped and concealed by their family


Kafka uses a series of high uncertainty words to reveal the lack of choices and control the protagonist possesses at the “house”, thus indicating the limited ways that the protagonist represents himself. Where, in line 1, the author writes “seem to have fully made up your mind” (1) in describing the character’s decision of staying at home, the phrase “seem to have” gives this choice a high uncertainty and reflects that the protagonist lacks the confidence to make such decision at home. Secondly, the “instantly appear” (13) used to describe the action of going out strengthens the idea of the protagonist lacking choice and control. When he is finally on the streets, Kafka includes the description of “limbs” (18) that reflects the protagonist’s unrealistic feeling of being outside, that he only knows where he is based on the physical feeling, but not cognitively.

Achieving the same effect, Kafka also uses words of passive voice to achieve similar effect. In line 5, Kafka uses the word “habitually” to describe the action of “going to bed” the protagonist carries out, indicating the routine-like behavior that the protagonist follows very often. Moreover, the use of “causing…a matter of course” (6) and “unexpected freedom” (19) are other places where passive voice indicate the protagonist’s lack of power.

Finally, towards the end of the story, Kafka directly addresses the issue by stating that the protagonist has “withdrawn from [his] family” and became a “sharply defined black silhouette” (26). This implies that in order to find his true place and comfort zone, the protagonist had to escape his family. Moreover, on the line after, Kafka explicitly includes the words “true stature” to clearly address this issue.

Analysis of Persepolis Page 51-52

Context: Siama, Laly’s father, was just released from prison, and Siama is telling Marjane his experience in jail.

The clearer version of the picture is in the link here.

These two pages outline the inhuman punishments performed on the prisoners and the effect of these punishments on young Marjane through the use of boarder-less panel, specific content, and the protagonist’s monologue.

Satrapi uses a boarder-less panel depicting the brutal punishments performed on Ahmadi, a guerilla who was arrested before he could use the cyanide to suicide. The fact that Ahmadi was unable to even perform the action of suicide highlights the danger and possible threats that might fall upon the Iranian people at that time, further explaining reasons behind Marjane’s frightening, disturbing reaction to the war in Iran. The boarder-less panel signals the many different ways the victim could be punished, expanding the reader’s thoughts beyond the three types of punishments listed in the drawing, suggesting the amount of suffer war brings to the soldiers.

On the top right panel, Satrapi includes a picture of Ahmadi cut into pieces to compare the cruel truth brought by war that the innocent Marjane is facing at this young age. The innocence of the narrator could be seen through the form in which the victim is presented, cut with sharp edges but remains a concrete human shape, suggesting the inability of Marjane to visualize a more brutal way of cutting people. This reflects the dramatic effect of war on Marjane as she is exposed to the violence of war in her childhood. Additionally, the victim is drawn hollow and boneless, symbolizing the severe aftereffects of the inhuman punishments that is a result of war in Iran, addressing the effect of the 1979 Iran revolution.

The effect of war on Marjane is more distinctly presented through the use of Marjane’s monologue. In the bottom panel on the left of the page, Satrapi records Marjane’s thoughts using emotional expressions such as “never imagined” and “appliance for torture”, signaling the huge amount of shock brought to the protagonist and revealing how Marjane is forced to accept the violent image of using an iron for punishment. The juxtaposition of “appliance” and “torture” enhances the ironical feeling in the passage, communicating Satrapi’s criticism towards the punishments used in the revolution, and, more importantly, the existence of the revolution itself. Furthermore, in the bottom right panel, Satrapi exposes the effect of war on Marjane through an actual example of her leaving the house and walking on the street. The coordination conjunction “so” indicates the cause and effect relationship between the tasks “father was not a hero, mother wanted to kill people” and the action of the protagonist going outside. These seemingly unrelated events indicates the confusion of Marjane and her attempt to escape the reality, suggesting the amount of trauma exposure to the story of punishments have on her.


As we got deeper into Duffy’s poetry, “The World’s Wife”, I figured that there are lots of connections between the poems in the collection. As this poem is wrote in the perspective of female, there are many opinions and impressions for the male identity that Duffy incorporates with the well-known stories in the world. The three poems I found connections in were Mrs Sisyphus, Mrs Faust, and Mrs Quasimodo. All of which were told in the perspective of married women, whose emotions are left unattended by their husbands. These poems emphasize on the materialism life as well as the unreasonable focus on fame and work.


So, starting with “Mrs Sisyphus”, it was based on the Greek mythology of the king of Ephyra. The most famous image of him is the figure pushing the stone up the hill, but the stone keeps on falling back to the starting place after Sisyphus has pushed it to the top. This is exactly how the poem starts “That’s him pushing the stone up the hill” but Duffy added an internal voice of the persona commenting that action right behind it, “the jerk”, showing her distinct attitude and introducing the main idea of the poem: male focus on lame and infinite work and tend to lose their meaning in these meaningless actions. The structure of the poem is somewhat interesting as it ties in with the main idea and sort of helps express it. The poem is made with three stanzas, the opening, 5 lines, the ending, 8 lines, and a massive long 19-line middle stanza full of pieces of Sisyphus’s beliefs and will. The long middle stanza of the poem symbolizes the tedious task Sisyphus repeats, both contextually and structurally. Another interesting point taken from Duffy’s interview with Barry Woods is that almost all the words rhymes or half rhymes with the word “work”, again emphasizing the main idea of the poem. If we look into the lines of the poems, it also provides the same idea. For example, in the middle stanza Duffy writes “Folk flock from miles around just to gawk//they think it’s a quirk” to show the meaning less of the work itself through the reaction of the “folk[s]” that came from other places to watch the work, and thought of it as a “quirk”, a joke, a bad habit. Moreover, this work that Sisyphus is so focused on never ends, as shown through lines “that feckin’ stone’s no sooner up//than it’s rolling back//all the way down”, the stone rolls down right after he’s pushed it up. The attitude of Sisyphus towards his work, despite the obvious flaw, is surprisingly optimistic as he says “Think of the perks” and “Mustn’t shirk”, Sisyphus is certain that the work he is doing has purpose and feels the responsibility to accomplish it. By pointing that out, Duffy leads the poem to the useless “hundred per cent and more” effort that people give to their work.


Moving on to “Mrs Faust”, this poem talks about the life of Faust and his wife. Faust, as a famous literary figure, is an ordinary person whom sold his soul to the devil in exchange for honor and fame. In this poem he represents the side of fame, and Mrs. Faust represents the side of materialism. Again, structure first, the contextual shape of this poem goes from the two being together, then split apart each living their own lives, coming back to each other at the end when Faust confessed his guilt, and finally with Mrs. Faust alone in “everything [Faust left] to me”. After they married, Faust “grew to love the kudos,//not the wife” and even “went to whores.” But on the contrary, Mrs. Faust, who’s focused on material life only, “felt, not jealousy, but chronic irritation.” So she accepted the relationship and shifted her focus onto other things such as “t’ai chi, Feng Shui, therapy” and so on. The next few stanzas revealed the pernicious habit that Faust picked up, he went to parties and enjoyed the fame that he trade with his soul, he continued cheating on his wife, and tried many different jobs just for fun. This is the exaggeration of the habit of those who blindly looks for fame in the real world while the tragedy ending serves as a warning. On the other hand, Faust’s wife spent her life going around and trying everything out, she lived completely to her greed, “celibate,//teetotal, vegan,//Buddhist…” That on itself actually sounded like a stylish lifestyle to me at the start, but the ending where Mrs. Faust bought a kidney and cured her illness flips the whole message around. In one way it emphasizes the effect brought by such a husband like Faust, on the other hand it criticizes the materialism lifestyle, which is a common trend in people nowadays. Even the author herself, Duffy claimed to be a shopaholic in the interview with Barry Woods.


Lastly, “Mrs Quasimodo”. This poem is based on Victor Hugo’s story of a deformed bell ringer, who fell in love with a beautiful girl. But Duffy told it in Quasimodo’s wife’s view, she was as ugly, deformed as he was, and was also a bell ringer. Although not the most significant focus, this poem mentions the change of love, Quasimodo slowly loses interest in his wife, and Mrs. Quasimodo results that change in his love of his work, ringing the bells. The structure of this poem is quite random, as there are no specific number of lines to each stanza, and there are no consistent rhyme scheme throughout. At the start, when they’ve just married, Quasimodo would swing “an epithalamium” for his wife and she viewed the poem as “sexy” and “exuberant”, which are all generally praising words. The contrast that exists between the word “sexy” and Mrs. Quasimodo’s description of her husband’s trait highlights the value of her love, how it has gone past the appearance. Even such pure love was betrayed, and Mrs. Quasimodo blames this situation on the bells that Quasimodo values very much, he even gave names to each one of them. Mrs. Quasimodo revenged by “murdering” all the bells and pulling all the clappers in the bells out, that way they cannot sound anymore. On one side this is a poem about jealousy and betrayal, but it also signifies the importance of the bells to Quasimodo. This makes one of the main ideas of the poem to be the amount of attention people, especially males, put on their work and the consequences that comes with it.


In conclusion, the three poems, Mrs. Sisyphus, Mrs. Faust, and Mrs. Quasimodo, more or less focuses on the idea of man being too focused on specific aspect of life, either work or fame, and the consequences of these.

The Secret in Carol Ann Duffy’s Poems Reflection

We have finished the study of the selected poems in Green Rice, and are now moving on to 15 of the 30 poems in Carol Ann Duffy’s collection The World’s Wife. Before the actual study of specific poems starts, we, as usual, were given tasks to explore the background of both the collection and the poet. An article called “The Public and Private” explores areas regarding the incentives that lead to Duffy’s creation of all her poems in general as well as the specific analysis of a few poems in the collection that really highlights the main themes. Based on the reading, here are a few points that I found interesting and might help with future studies of the poem:


– The contrast in writing styles (tones) and language uses in different poems within the collection (intertextuality)

– Characterization of men as useless, incompetent, arrogant, vain, and unnecessary

– The reveal of a character’s hidden secrets


The article suggests that Duffy often adds ambiguity in the persona in poems before The World’s Wife. Using this point as a hint, the choice of certain tones in the collections are even more deliberate as the identity of personas are explicitly given by the poem titles. This method of making the identity translucent invites the reader to have deeper thoughts into the real intention behind Duffy’s creation and helps readers to have a better understanding when reading the poem. As seen in the first two poems in the collection, the poem’s form shifts from a narration of a story to the description of Thetis’ thoughts. The real intention of these choices could be explored in a more detailed way as the identity is given. Being sensitive to the poem’s form, to me, is important in terms of understanding the poet’s real intention of writing the collection.


The second point is merely the central theme that runs through the poem. As present in all the poems, the characterization of men is often linked with words that has a derogatory sense. This reflects the personal experiences of Duffy, where she met a poet at the age of 16 and fell in love with him…… It is interesting observing how these experiences are reflected in the poems. (I am a bit offended by the descriptions)


Thirdly, the article suggests that the content of the poem relates to one of the beliefs that Duffy holds toward childhood. She believes that everybody in their childhood, or even adulthood, have some hidden experiences, secrets, in their mind. Based on this belief, Duffy is bounded to revealing these hidden secrets in the characters that appears in her poems; for example, as stated in the article about the poem Mrs. Darwin, the persona implies that she is the one who came up with the idea of the theory of evolution. These hidden thoughts are fascinating to discover as it lights up the “light bulb” the way when characters in anime come up with good ideas.


So above are the three most meaningful, significant points that I summarized from reading the article.

Global Issue Presented in “The Nest”

As we studied the poem collection Green Rice, we each picked a poem to analyze. The poem I chose is “The Nest” and below is my interpretation to it.


The strand I will be focused on is Beliefs, value and education.

In particular: How education plays a role in the growth of children.

The poem mostly states how the egg, representing the child, stays alone during the process of hatching, and linked that to how the nest made with straw and grass, indicating knowledge and books, enriches the child’s life and ensures him/her to healthily grow until hatching. The poem is written in chronological structure, where the egg first “rises” (7), then becomes something for the nest, and finally hatches into “insistent life” (32). Throughout the process, the state of the nest is constantly brought to attention. At the start of the poem when “Mysterious silence deepens” (1), Lam uses the word “shake” (3) to represent the effect of silence on the nest. The word “shake” could be associated with the emotion of fear, and if the nest represents the knowledge as a whole, it is suggesting that knowledge left alone is vulnerable in the sense that it could be easily lost. This explains why the nest “shake[s]” as its been left alone. Then, as the egg appears in the nest, the knowledge is being acquired and thus the silence is replaced with “chanting voice” (6). On the egg’s (child) perspective, it gains knowledge from the point of birth and slowly turns into a “full” (10), “beautiful” (26) egg. Here the relation between education and the child is specified, and Lam points out how they help each other as they both gain benefits from the relationship.

The poem constantly mentions the symbol of “strands of straw and grass” (13), in my interpretation they could be books. Unread books are worthless and thus has no purpose of existing, this idea is illustrated in the fourth stanza of the poem where they are “woven without soul” (14). However, as the egg touches the books, as the child grows to a stage that he/she can read, the books “become musical strings” (15) both themselves and to the child. The next two stanzas describes the relation between the egg and the nest in more detail as Lam used similar structure to indicate the complexity of how they are affecting each other. The symbol of life and death is also significant as the poem progresses. The idea of an “ivory egg” in line 5 indicates that there are lots of sacrifices made by other people in order for the egg to exist. Furthermore, the exact phrasing appears again in line 26, but this time accompanied with the descriptions of “Dry grass and straw” (25) , as well as the direct statement of “death supports life” (27). In this case, the death could be seen as the knowledges that is already being learnt, and the life could be how new knowledge, new values are formed within the child. Finally, at the end of the poem, Lam further expresses the hope that is put towards the egg. Lam uses a simile comparing the hatching of the egg to “a sprout splitting a seed” (31) to indicate the continuation of life. The power of nature is appreciated and associated with the hatching of an egg, which on itself would be part of the cycle of nature. Thus, Lam extends the hope into “Many skies will fill with life” (34) at the end to emphasize the continuity of Vietnam and Vietnam people.

Overall, this poem “The Nest” models the relationship between education and the child, and thus expanding and connecting to the formation of any community.

Paper 1 reflection

PP1 Tight-Rope Walker


The thing that I am satisfied with this paper is my planning and how I stuck to the plan while I write. The three points listed were well followed and developed as I wrote the paper, and from the process, I came up with a bigger point which made my conclusion relatively strong. The success of this time is because I didn’t rush my reading section based on my relative slow reading speed, I took my time and tried to understand the text as much as I can before summarizing up the annotations and forming them into points. Also, the time management was pretty well sorted, I had 2-3 minutes at the end to proof read my paper and I found a few places with grammar or spelling mistakes. Aspects that I didn’t do so well are the connection between the question, in this case “tension”, and my points and my reasoning explaining the points. Starting with the connection, I forgot to take in mind the questions while I annotate and plan my paper. It could be caused by the lack of interpretation of the deeper meaning of the text, in other words, I am only reading the plot of the text but not the intention of the author upon writing this text. As a consequence of that problem, my points may be deviated from the message of the text, which then makes it hard for me to form a strong reasoning based on the points. Another possible cause of that problem may be because of the lack of vocabulary, for example, in this text I interpreted the meaning of “meadow” as a type of bird that’s similar to an eagle where it actually is a grass field. However, this isn’t a big problem because as I read more book and practice for the SAT test (cough cough…), my vocabulary is going to improve. Ways to improve the problem of interpretation would be to take my time on interpreting the text and think more on the point of view of author-reader relationship when annotating and planning. Also, I need to be more aware of the stylistic features (the “style” part of the given guiding sheet of annotation) as it helps me to understand the intention of the author and thus deepens my point. If a target needs to be set for the next paper, I would say to focus my point as much as possible on the guiding question and to keep up with the planning and time management.

Global Issue Discussed in Chapter 4 of ‘Grendel’

In chapter 4, the author addresses the global issue of educational propaganda. Gardner uses Grendel as the narrator and carries out an extended metaphor of how people are undergoing biased education and blindly believing it. Gardner does this by portraying the Shaper as the educator, the king Hrothgar as the learner, and Grendel as a character from a different culture who has different believes than the students. The author first creates a contrast between the ideas of “a glorious meadhall whose light would shine to the ends of the ragged world” (Gardner, Chapter 4) and “The thought took seed”. The idea of an eternal meadhall is really abstract and impossible to accomplish, yet the Shaper made it sound so real that a king as “great” as Hrothgar is believing it. This action of implanting false information into the learner’s mind while the learner has no idea of the validity of that information. For example, if you read about dihydrogen monoxide with no prior knowledge of the component of water, you would’ve fall into the trap of believing that this substance is actually harmful. When other people whose not involved in this situation, in this case Grendel, see this, they will easily find out the absurdity in the education. Grendel points out the flaw by understanding the most basic motivation of the educator, “by changing men’s minds [the Shaper] makes the best of it”, but then contradicts himself with “and it wasn’t true”. This shows a sense of concern that Gardner has towards the reason why people are doing this false education but somewhat have an idea of that; more importantly, Gardner points out the irony and raises awareness of this problem through Grendel’s realization of himself being affected while being a side-listener. Later on the chapter, Grendel says to the audience that he “knew very well that all [the Shaper] said was ridiculous”, but Grendel “was swept up” by what the Shaper has said. By introducing this part, Gardner addresses the chain effect that will occur with the educational propaganda: one victim may spread this false information to many others and thus create a “snowball” effect. Gardner, again, emphasizes his awareness and concern about the educational propaganda that is happening in the world.

Global Issue Discussed in Chapter 1 of ‘Grendel’


In chapter one Gardner addresses the issue of racial discrimination. He reveals and emphasizes this idea in the paragraph where Grendel meets the doe and, despite the fact that Grendel has “never killed a deer in all his life”, the doe immediately runs away after it recollects its consciousness. This scene is a sarcasm towards the racial discrimination that is happening in our world nowadays, where Grendel was judged and labelled a “monster” simply by his appearance and identity. This judgement outlines the unfairness of how certain groups of people are being treated. Furthermore, Grendel, in this scene, had no harmful intention towards the doe even after he was repelled; all Grendel did was “bawl at the splintered sunlight” for the “blind prejudice” that acted upon him. The word “bawl” carries a connotation of helplessness, where Grendel craves for the acceptance and acts in the best way he could, but eventually receives nothing. This choice of word reveals how Gardner is sympathizing with the isolated race and wants to bring awareness to this issue. Moreover, Gardner highlights Grendel’s way of treating different species through the phrase, “but no more dislike than I feel for other natural things”. The author emphasizes the innocence of Grendel, in this case representing the innocence of the discriminated group. With the above description, Gardner’s concern towards the discriminated group is revealed.