Editing and Revision Guidelines for Essays

Written feedback for your essays will take the following form: 


  1. Major feedback will be structured to resemble the chart below. All comments must be read and addressed in any revision.
  2. Grammar/style/mechanics will—at most— be directly addressed on one page. At other places in the essay, X-marks may be placed in the margin next to errors. The student is responsible for discerning and correcting those errors individually or through the help of a colleague.
  3. Revised essays must include a clearly written and formatted cover page of more than 150 words in which all the feedback is addressed. In particular, the facilitative feedback in “Revision Requirements” must be directly addressed and answered. Revised essays submitted without cover sheets or with cover sheets that do not address what they are required to will not be graded or commented on.
  4. You will have one week from when essays are returned to your class as a whole to work on your revision.
  5. As always, all essays, unless otherwise allowed, are due at ISB COB: 6PM.
  6. Students who submit more than one essay to an assignment, or submit their work to a different assignment, may fail to receive comments at the discretion of the instructor or due to technical issues raised by the repeat submission.
  7. The first time a student conducts clear plagiarism, at the teacher’s discretion, the student may be allowed the opportunity to rehabilitate her research and citation methods. In order to receive this opportunity, the student must re-submit the essay with a descriptive cover sheet of 250 or more words that uses the “Did I Plagiarize?” infographic as a guide. The student must use the exact language of the poster and its conclusions when crafting the cover sheet.


Essay Feedback Format

Summary A summary of the main strengths and weakness of the work. Recommendations for moving forward.
Global Concerns
  • Does this paper respond to the central task of the assignment?
  • Does it do the work that this genre of paper is supposed to do?
  • Does it have a strong central claim or argument?
  • Is it effectively organized for readers?
  • Does the paper engage the relevant academic debate and dialog? How?
  • Where do you fall on the IB rubric? Why?
    • Your score out of 15 (20 on the old rubric) will be posted here.
Local Concerns
  • Are there formatting and citation errors?
  • How can the grammar and mechanics be improved?
  • Where can diction be improved?
  • Is the evidence provided specific, correct and concise?
  • Where can the style be improved?
  • Does the work suggest effective proofreading was conducted?
Revision Requirements All corrections and comments made in all the categories above are considered requirements for revision. This section include additional requirements in the form of facilitative feedback. All requirements in this section must be addressed in your cover sheet for your revision.
The ticking clock The time left you have develop your writing before your IB exams.


Examples of Facilitative Feedback
  • How did you manage to rewrite your thesis statement in a way that changed it into a clear focused response to the prompt with an original main idea? 
  • How did you change the writing in the body of your essay to consistently support and refer to your new, narrowly focused thesis? 
  • According to Zinn, complex layers of actors in US society both supported and opposed WWI at different times for different reasons. Demonstrate that you can discern whom and when while analyzing causes and impacts of the war on US society.
  • Consider looking at the issue from the perspective of other historians we have studied during this unit. Which would provide additional perspectives to enrich your argument?
  • Did ALL Mexicans hate the USA during World War I? If you attempt to claim this, you need support based on cited research.